If your wife has drifted away from you and is showing signs of falling out of love, you're probably wondering "how can I get my wife to love me again?".

Reigniting love and passion is not an impossible task, not by a long shot. The best approach, though, will often be determined by what went wrong in the first place. For example, my ex- husband treated me like crap. No, he didn't beat me, but he belittled me every chance he got. When we were at his family's house for a holiday meal he made an extremely rude comment about my cooking... in front of his whole family. That was bad enough but when I told him it hurt my feelings and I was humiliated to have his whole family laugh at me, he said that I 'was too sensitive'.

Years later, after the divorce, I was seeing a therapist and he explained to me that my ex husband's comment about me being too sensitive was really just a way for him to hurt me without owning up to what he was doing. He was so insecure, and unsure of the man he was that he felt powerful and in control when he could hurt me.

Now, I'm happily remarried and he's unhappily remarried (at least according to my kids). The point is, if you've treated your wife like that you've dug yourself a deep hole and you had better be prepared to do some heavy lifting to get yourself out of it. You should also consider seeing a counselor to find out why you are so insecure that you would lash out and humiliate someone who you say you love.

If you want to get your wife to love you again the first step is to become someone worthy of her love. For that you may need some help.

If the problem in your relationship isn't about abuse, but rather just a general drifting apart, it will probably be easier to 'cure'. Growing apart is a very common problem in many long term relationships. It's common and usually pretty easy to overcome. The first thing you have to do is take the time to remind your wife of the man you are, the man she fell in love with.

Some men don't seem to know how to show affection. Our society makes it too easy for men to cop out of their mistakes. How many times have you heard the expression 'it's a guy thing'? More often than not that expression is used to explain some behavior that is inappropriate, a cop out.

Spend time with your wife. Show her that you really like her. Do you talk to her? Do you confide your hopes, dreams and fears to her? If not, why not? Is it because you're a man and that's not what men do? Sorry, fella, but that's B.S. If you truly like, love and respect your wife you'll share with her the whole you (most women would appreciate the fact that their man opened up to them like that, you don't always have to be the tough guy).

Hey, the love you want might be closer than you think. If you've been wondering: how can I get my wife to love me again, your first step might be to just ask her.